This is usually when folks start looking - I mean, really looking - at resolutions for the New Year.
I think this is a great activity for list makers, who should excel at this sort of thing. It is also a triumph of hope over experience, for how many of those resolutions made every year are actually kept? In that vein, it is a testimonial to the resiliency of the human spirit, that spirit that never gives up...never, ever, ever gives up.
If there is a gene for resolution making, I am lacking it. So far, I have not made New Year's Resolutions. I remember one year when I began a physical self-improvement program which included strict control of what I ate and didn't eat...right before Thanksgiving! My friends and family asked why I would choose to embark upon such a thing at that time of year: why not wait until after the holidays, in January, when everyone else is doing it. It seemed simple to me...why wait to do something I needed to do for my health and emotional well-being when I could start that minute?
There is value in taking stock of where one is on their path and, if that is the purpose NYRs serve, then let the stock-taking begin! There has to be a plan in place in order to tweak and refine it. Resolutions may serve as a mini-plan for life in the coming year.
So, in the stock-taking department, this is what I suggest...
...be clear on the five most important things in your life right now.
One should have an idea of what is of value, what one's purpose is, what gives existence meaning. If those things are
clear, goal-setting becomes a breeze and goal-setting leads to creating a road map...drawing out the route which takes us
to our destination.
It is okay to have side trips along the way. Being too focused, having tunnel vision, often keeps us from
the serendipitous experiences which create the wonderful tapestry of our lives or serve as a course correction.
...know the five most traumatic events of your life.
Healing is essential in order to live one's authentic life. Splinters, left under the skin, have a way of festering into sores,
eventually working their way to the surface to be extracted. Buried emotions are no different. The power our "shadow"
selves have over us comes from our refusal to look at them. Once we shine a light upon what we fear the most, we have
the opportunity to neutralize or eliminate what has plagued and paralyzed us. If we can't 'speak' it, how can we deal with it?
"Feeling Buried Alive Never Die..." by Karol K. Truman
"Owning Your Own Shadow: Understanding the Dark Side..." by Robert Johnson
...just two of the books that can start the process
...understand the power of one's thoughts and words.
Every time I have said "I can't...", I have been right.
Never is one of the biggest words in the English language.
We acknowledge the power our minds have to create havoc, unhappiness, disease, and resentment. Why is it so
difficult to accept the reality that our thoughts create, peace, joy, wellness and gratitude?
Thinking a thing is one thing. Believing that thing is everything. We don't have to believe everything we think. The
art comes in knowing which thought to discard and which one to allow to empower us. This is a daily practice just
like Chi Gong, Yoga, meditation, exercise and making lifestyle choices that optimize our ability to life fully. All of those
things help us with the thinking/believing thing.
...be fearless in expressing love.
Love yourself first. If you don't love yourself, how can you expect anyone else to do so? If you love yourself, you are enough.
Your journey is then enhanced by the participation of others in it, but not dependent upon their doing so. Paul Chek said
something very powerful on a PPS call: 'Creating a state of happiness that depends upon the actions of others is a recipe for
unhappiness.'
Be enough for yourself. Be the kind of person you would want to spend the rest of your life with. Radiate this and
it will be what is drawn to you. Be a magnet for love. Love unconditionally. Love deeply. Don't wait to love.
"The Mastery of Love" by Don Miguel Ruiz
"I Need Your Love - Is That True?" by Byron Katie with Michael Katz
And, should you choose to be alone, you will be fine with that, too, because you are enough!
...be serious about life, but don't take yourself too seriously!
Life is full of delicious ironies, as I like to call those "life is what happens while you're busy making other plans" events.
Enjoy the irony! Laughter is powerful, a healing experience, great for the abs and better than a face lift. And you know
the mind cannot hold two disparate thoughts at the same time...it is impossible to be both miserable and elated. So
go with the flow, revel in the humor, enjoy the absurdity, delight in your human-ness.
...know that it takes as long as it takes.
"Rome wasn't built in a day." Cliche, but true. Undoing what has taken us a lifetime to create, if that is our goal, is not
an overnight accomplishment. We may not get it right the first time. So what? The Universe will continue to give us the
opportunity to become what we were sent here to become...to do what we were sent here to do...to find the path with our
name on it.
Accept that The Universe has a plan, that we have an important part to play - even if it is a small one - and that we
will be able to fulfill our destiny.
We arrive where we are supposed to be at exactly the time we are supposed to be there.
So, my New Year's Resolutions?
Sit back. Relax. Enjoy the ride, bumpy or smooth.
Smile, smile, smile.
Study and learn so that I will be ready when the opportunity presents itself.
Enjoy the quirky...things and people.
Know it is my responsibility to protect myself from disempowering energies.
Be grateful...for my genetics, for my teachers and mentors, for my growth, for the things yet to come, that I do not have
a crystal ball. As John McMullen always says, or words to this affect, 'Let me continue to be surprised.'
Life is either too long or too short, depending on how you are living it! Life fully...
...Happy New Year.
